At 61 years of age, of course, I ride my bicycle a lot slower than I used to. Additionally, I really have no desire to go faster. Just the act of getting out on the bike is a great accomplishment in itself. There was a graphic that was displayed at bikeforums dot net, where I am a Moderator, that said "No matter how slow you are, you're still lapping everyone on the couch". I guess that's true, and especially so as I age.
I know there's some others that are my age or so that can ride nearly as fast as they used to. Or that's what they say, anyway. I have a lot of friends at my church that ride bikes, too. Pastor Steve (who actually lives in Virginia now, but he's still Pastor Steve), Tony, Bryan, and a couple other guys ride. Sometimes they say "Hey, we should go out riding some time!" But I've seen them ride, and they are pretty fast – so I keep making excuses to not ride with them. I don't think they would enjoy riding at half their normal speed just to let an old feller keep up with them.
So, generally, I always ride my bike alone so I can go wherever I want at the usually slow speed I want. These other guys think I'm being unsociable, I guess, but that's not true – I'm just slow.
Part of getting used to being in your 60s is realizing that when a person is in their 60s, they look like they're in their 60s. A little part of my brain wants to believe I still look like I did when I was in my 30s or 40s, but I don't. As I have grown older, I've noticed that people respond to me differently even though I'm essentially the same person. Relatives (nieces and nephews especially) act quite a bit differently. People at church unconsciously snub me, because they want to be around the younger, cooler crowd. It must be appearance. If you look like you're in your 60s, people classify you in their minds as an "old person". In some respects that can be useful, but other times it can be hurtful.
In El Paso, which is a largely Hispanic community, looking elderly can be a good thing. The Hispanic culture puts a lot of respect on its elderly, and as I get greyer and more "wrinkly" I've noticed people, even strangers, are more respectful. I hear "sir" a lot and people downtown, even those that look like gangsters, hold doors open for me.
Church gets me a little upset. Inside, I'm not much different than they are. I have hopes, and dreams, and emotions. I look at the little "cliques" of friends and sometimes long to be part. But during the long 3+ years my wife and I have been part of that particular church, we have yet to have an invitation to someone's home for dinner, or out for a lunch after church, or something like that. I play acoustic guitar in the church band, and it's comical – After the service, I pack up my gear by myself, sit around, maybe say "hi" to a couple of people, then just leave. I have rarely been approached by an individual even for small talk. All the young people in the church are too busy being friendly to each other to engage me in conversation. During one "Sunday School" class just for men, I told them all of this, too. However, even though I brought it out into the open, no one has responded.
Bonnie has missed four church services in a row, and yet no one has asked about her, and no one has called her or attempted to contact her in any way.
There's virtually no difference in Bonnie and I now and Bonnie and I 20 years ago – except now we look "elderly". We are no longer "cool". I guess being "cool" is not the point. The point is that if I did not play acoustic guitar reasonably well, we would have no place at all in this church, either socially or otherwise.
And so it goes.
I’m still planning on starting cycling again on or right after December 1st. I figure it’s either the bike or the walker, my choice. I choose the bike.
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